| Parenting Your Way |
Raising a Child with Spiritual Faith
by Maura Steblay, MA ed.
by Maura Steblay, MA ed.
The essence of belief is the establishment of a habit. - CS Pierce
Spirituality refers to the uniquely personal and subjective experience of God, or the trancendent. It refers to that orientation to something
beyond, a sense of meaning, an innate yearning for relational connection with something greater. As creators of the culture in your home, as the
architects of your family values, parents and guardians have enormous influence in their children’s spiritual lives. Maybe your goal is to achieve
a greater understanding of how to integrate spirituality into your family life. Maybe you just want to practice your faith and spiritual journey in
your own way, but remain open to sharing our choices with your children. Either way it’s important to know faith is based on three primary
ingredients: knowledge, belief, and trust.
Before I can send you on a vacation or errand, whether or not you have a map in your possession, you would need me to tell you the starting
point. Similarly, when teaching spirituality to our children we need to foremost, know our own foundation. A basic or thorough understanding
of our faith allows us to share our passion with others. Knowledge is power.
10 practical ideas to pass on spiritual faith through knowledge are:
Our beliefs are passed on through many factors like verbal communication, non-verbal communication, family practices, and spiritual rituals.
Some of the key messages which I believe have great importance in passing on our beliefs are:
When speaking of trust, my third ingredient of faith based teaching, contemplate the following pillars of security; spiritual people, spiritual
places, spiritual routines, and spiritual rituals. Are these three things infused in your family life? Are they integral to your personal life? It’s
important to walk the talk rather than maintain a common parenting axiom, “Do as I say not as I do.” When your child’s beliefs are still in their
liquid, forming state try not to scold or accuse: instead remind. Remind them of the ‘whys’ behind your beliefs. Remind them of the ‘whos’ and
‘whens’ of your dogma. Most specifically, teach them to respect others and the opinions they carry. Learning is often most effective when we
start out with the polar opposite opinion.
Benjamin Franklin said, in Poor Richard’s Almanac, “Too much of a good thing is still too much.” So remember to maintain balance with social,
mental, spiritual, and physical endeavors. The attention span of a young child is about one-fifth as long as an adult.
One closing thought on raising a child with spiritual faith, “In a small matter trust the mind…in the large one, the heart.” S Freud
Maura Steblay has a Masters degree in Education and is the president of Parenting Unlimited. She is mother to two daughters ages 10 and 13.
She has worked in both corporate America and in Early Childhood Family Education. She is a volunteer at Children's Hospital answering the
Parent Warmline, is a board member on the Foundation for Eden Prairie Schools and the West Suburban Teen Clinic.
Spirituality refers to the uniquely personal and subjective experience of God, or the trancendent. It refers to that orientation to something
beyond, a sense of meaning, an innate yearning for relational connection with something greater. As creators of the culture in your home, as the
architects of your family values, parents and guardians have enormous influence in their children’s spiritual lives. Maybe your goal is to achieve
a greater understanding of how to integrate spirituality into your family life. Maybe you just want to practice your faith and spiritual journey in
your own way, but remain open to sharing our choices with your children. Either way it’s important to know faith is based on three primary
ingredients: knowledge, belief, and trust.
Before I can send you on a vacation or errand, whether or not you have a map in your possession, you would need me to tell you the starting
point. Similarly, when teaching spirituality to our children we need to foremost, know our own foundation. A basic or thorough understanding
of our faith allows us to share our passion with others. Knowledge is power.
10 practical ideas to pass on spiritual faith through knowledge are:
- 1. Share your faith story
2. Celebrate faith through rituals
3. Pray together
4. Enrich spiritual relationships
5. Perform acts of justice and service
6. Evaluate undercurrents
7. Put learning 1st, personal goals aside
8. Create a Book of Questions about faith OR Create a spiritual or religious memory book
9. Evaluate how much time you devote to spirituality
10. Why wait?
Our beliefs are passed on through many factors like verbal communication, non-verbal communication, family practices, and spiritual rituals.
Some of the key messages which I believe have great importance in passing on our beliefs are:
- Parents are involved in the process either positively or negatively and possess two times the influence of any other factor through age 14.
- Parents need to model the behavior they are asking their children to model.
- Parents need to demonstrate their understanding of a larger, more global consciousness.
- Parents need to model the virtues; love, peace, hope, compassion, and harmony in their daily thoughts, words, and deeds.
- Parents need to model spiritual strategies.
- Parents need to demonstrate how they connect to a higher power.
When speaking of trust, my third ingredient of faith based teaching, contemplate the following pillars of security; spiritual people, spiritual
places, spiritual routines, and spiritual rituals. Are these three things infused in your family life? Are they integral to your personal life? It’s
important to walk the talk rather than maintain a common parenting axiom, “Do as I say not as I do.” When your child’s beliefs are still in their
liquid, forming state try not to scold or accuse: instead remind. Remind them of the ‘whys’ behind your beliefs. Remind them of the ‘whos’ and
‘whens’ of your dogma. Most specifically, teach them to respect others and the opinions they carry. Learning is often most effective when we
start out with the polar opposite opinion.
Benjamin Franklin said, in Poor Richard’s Almanac, “Too much of a good thing is still too much.” So remember to maintain balance with social,
mental, spiritual, and physical endeavors. The attention span of a young child is about one-fifth as long as an adult.
One closing thought on raising a child with spiritual faith, “In a small matter trust the mind…in the large one, the heart.” S Freud
Maura Steblay has a Masters degree in Education and is the president of Parenting Unlimited. She is mother to two daughters ages 10 and 13.
She has worked in both corporate America and in Early Childhood Family Education. She is a volunteer at Children's Hospital answering the
Parent Warmline, is a board member on the Foundation for Eden Prairie Schools and the West Suburban Teen Clinic.
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